You have no idea how addiction fucks you up. What it is like to go through life either still being addicted or in recovery. Yes, it took me 5 minutes of complete silence over the phone to be completely honest with you why I’ve had only one year of employment in each job for the past 3 years. It wasn’t because I was fired, I quit. I would save as much money as possible and then quit so I could continue drinking.

I couldn’t get a part time job because I was honest. Lesson learned. I need to redo my resume and it hurts. I have degraded myself, to tell you the truth, just for you to shame me. God I just wish I had never told. I’ve just been too honest lately. The funny part is, I know for a fact that they have people with drinking problems, who are currently addicted, working for them. How ironic that they don’t want someone who has had the guts to overcome it to work for them.

Alcoholism and drug use is okay as long as you don’t admit you have a problem. But once you do. You are fucked! No one cares about explanation, they would rather hire a person in denial about their addiction then you.

I feel ashamed. Can’t shake it off. Never ever tell the truth about your past. It’s a red flag. Why did I even try to speak about it? should have just pretended. My mind just went blank…

When I am sober, I am honest. That’s just me. I hate lying and cheating.

I do not want to be seen as handicapped, but at that point I was, and I have totally forgotten how other people see someone with addiction. I cannot blame them because there are a lot of addicts out there who never change, they are a constant problem.. but hey you are not an addict if you don’t admit it, even if its ruining your life.

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