So it’s Sunday night. Tomorrow is a work day. I am surprised that I am not anxious about tomorrow. Could it be that I’ve made progress? I’ve been incorporating coloring, and quiet times watching candle light in the dark, as a de-stressing method. Even now I have the candle lit up, there’s something very soothing and relaxing about it. I had an intense week, a lot of disturbances with drinking dreams and cravings in the back of my mind. Had to up my defenses and watch that craving closely to make sure it didn’t make me do the things that I would regret later. I am so relaxed right now it’s crazy. It’s a good thing that I went to the smart meeting today, it helped me to ease my disturbances after just mentioning them in a couple of sentences. I also learned that compulsive cravings don’t last longer than like 30 minutes. After 30 minutes, it’s just me obsessing about it. I mean that’s what they say. So before I go take a bath and top up my fish tank with water, here are my ten things that I am grateful for in general:

  1. Being alive
  2. My parents
  3. Not having to wake up tomorrow with a hangover
  4. My job and that it is close to my house
  5. My coworkers
  6. My car, that it is still running
  7. For feeling peaceful at this moment, being aware of it, knowing it won’t last long, and enjoying it every second.
  8. For people who’ve saved me and showed me that there is a way out from drinking
  9. Alcoholics Anonymous and Smart meetings
  10.  Having support from strangers
  11. For the future opportunities that I have since I don’t drink anymore
  12. Not relapsing and not giving up when I had the strongest craving I’ve ever had so far

I know it’s a little bit more than ten reasons, but they all deserve to be on my list, and I bet there are hundreds more that I could think of. A peaceful Sunday night to you all. I hope you are not drinking and doing well.

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