I only admitted that I am addicted to alcohol when being completely broken. I think as I get more time sober I go backward on this term, no one wants to be an alcoholic although weaknesses are always there.
I always roll my eyes at people who wear dumb shirts with recovery slogans. They have no class. So does addiction have to be public? You know all the stigma bs? Oh, stigma is wrong, stigma kills. Alcoholics Anonymous is the pioneer at this shit with all the anonymous shit. Why can’t I just simply state I am addicted to drinking without all the gasping and wild looks? What’s a big deal? It’s not that I am the only one who’s an addict? I think the problem comes because of relapse. Can I keep myself sober? Because usually, the people who are in relapse are the ones that stop giving a shit and supposedly mess everything up so they can’t be trusted around drugs, money, alcohol.They are incapable so do speak.
If you would go on a date would you mention you are an addict and have to pray every day to a higher power?– I am fucking around of course. I see my addiction as a strength as longest I don’t fuck up and start drinking again. Why is it a strength one might ask? The answer is that I am capable of saying no to one thing that temporarily provides me with an enormous amount of pleasure and empty meaning.
I see people at work all hungover all the time, I guess that’s becoming my devilish fun, even though they accomplished much more and made way more monies than me, but yet their red faces say “I don’t give a fuck.” I do savor the pleasure by taking my time to stare at them. Fuck, does that make me happy! Although I don’t specifically wish for them to be this way.
Drugging and drinking are so acceptable that if you try de-announce this habit, people will point fingers at you. Hey, better to keep on drinking to avoid all the shame that comes with sobriety.